Dragonfly Ranch Healing Arts Center    Healing Arts Retreat
Renewal Vows

Opening chant or song

Lei exchange

In the Hawaiian tradition it is customary to exchange leis as a symbol of respect for one another. The placing of the lei is completed with a hug and a gentle kiss on the cheek. As you exchange your leis, you will be symbolically encircling each other with love and respect.

Cindy and Tad, we come together in the presence of God to honor you as you renew your vows of marriage. We first acknowledge and celebrate the 24 years that you have lived together as husband and wife. Your decision to renew you vows is especially meaningful now, because the veils of romantic love have been lifted through the years, and given way to that which is ultimately more enduring, and that is your deep, abiding love for one another. You come to this ceremony as two people who have changed and grown since your wedding ceremony 24 years ago. You've successfully faced the trials and tribulations, as well as the triumphs, which are a normal part of living together for 24 years. You've shared the joys, as well as the heartaches. There is much you could teach me, and others, about the journey of the heart that could only be learned through your unique lives together.

It is such a blessing to be here in Hawaii in this beautiful land, and near the beautiful ocean today. The ancient Hawaiians lived close to the Earth and they were grateful for everyday blessings. This gratitude can transform your relationship and your life. The Hawaiians have always known the importance of taking time to enjoy the beauty of nature, to smell the exquisite flowers, and to swim in the warm, healing ocean waters. It provides an opportunity to listen to the silence and the sounds of nature and hear your inner truth. They honored the "aina" or land, and the "mana", or life force that emanates from a great universal source. The Hawaiian word, "aloha", literally means to give and share the sacred breath of life. Relating to one another in the spirit of aloha requires patience, and kindness, and the humility to go beyond where you've ever been in your capacity to love and be loved. It is a courageous path, for it is the path of the heart. Living together in the spirit of aloha transports you beyond the mundane to what is true and real.

The Hawaiians have another tradition called "ho'oponopono". It is a process for setting things right in order to sustain a happy and peaceful home and family. Ho'oponopono involves talking about the problems with truthfulness and sincerity. It requires making amends and forgiveness. And this forgiveness is made possible by first clearing the air and then by your willingness to let go of any trace of grievance and restore a place of peace between you. By honoring the tradition of ho'oponopono, your home becomes a haven of acceptance and a place of comfort where you will always know that the love you share is boundless and endures all things.

Above all, it is important to remember that love is what matters, and love will prevail. It is the love you feel for one another that has been the answer to your difficulties. Love will always be the miracle inviting you to blossom and expand. And it is to love that you must always return to renew yourselves.

The poet and mystic, Kahlil Gibran, wrote these words about love:

    Love gives naught but itself and take naught but from itself.
    Love possesses not nor would it be possessed;
    For love is sufficient unto love.
    When you love you should not say, ‘God is in my heart,’ but rather, ‘I am in the heart of God.’
    And think not that you can direct the course of love, for love, if it finds you worthy, directs your course.
    Love has no other desire but to fulfill itself.
    But if you love and must have desires, let these be your desires:
    To melt like a running brook that sings its melody to the night.
    To know the pain of too much tenderness.
    To be wounded by your own understanding of love;
    And to bleed willingly and joyfully.
    To wake at dawn with a winged heart and give thanks for another day of loving;
    To rest at the noon hour and meditate love's ecstasy;
    To return home at eventide with gratitude;
    And then to sleep with a prayer for the beloved in your heart and a song of praise upon your lips.

Cindy, Tad has been God's gift to you. In your love, he has found within himself a greater sense of who he is. You are asked to continue to see the good in this man, to accept him for who he is, and for who he shall become. You are asked to be the presence of truth. In this way, he will be healed and made stronger, and his highest purpose will be accomplished through your relationship. May this man find the beauty of heaven and his heart's deepest desire through the love you share for the rest of your lives.

And so it is with you Tad, that although Cindy has been God's gift to you, she was not a gift intended for you alone. You have been asked to so love this woman, that through your love, and through her connection with the Divine Spirit within her, she would find herself as she was created to be: so beautiful and strong and courageous and wise that the entire world would be blessed by the presence of a woman who shines so. In this way, she inspires the best in herself and in others.

Do you, Tad, promise to continue to love and cherish Cindy, and give her your heart's deepest devotion for the rest of your life?

Do you, Cindy, promise to continue to love and cherish Tad, and give him your heart's deepest devotion for the rest of your life?

Tad, please look into Cindy’s eyes and repeat after me:

    Cindy, thank you for being my wife. I now ask you to remain beside me for the rest of our lives. I pledge you my comfort and my love, my wisdom and my truth, my patience and my kindness. I choose to live the rest of my life with you because you are now and always, my truest love and dearest friend.

Cindy, please look into Tad’s eyes and repeat after me:

    Tad, thank you for being my husband. I now ask you to remain beside me for the rest of our lives. I pledge you my comfort and my love, my wisdom and my truth, my patience and my kindness. I choose to live the rest of my life with you because you are now and always, my truest love and dearest friend.

My prayer for you is that you find in each other's love such profound joy and happiness that your love will truly help to heal the world. May you create, with God, a piece of heaven on earth and be a shining example for all of us to follow. May the Source of all love touch, and bless you and grace your lives, now and forevermore.

Because you, Cindy and Tad, have promised to continue to love each other and share all your remaining days, it is my great honor to now re-pronounce you husband and wife. You may seal your vows with a kiss

Dragonfly Ranch Healing Arts Center

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